Xinman’s poem “There Is Only One Sun, Let Others Catch”, explores a central challenge of modern life: how to preserve inner independence in a world that values exposure, performance, and public recognition. In the age of social media, where visibility is often mistaken for worth, the sense of inner selfhood grows increasingly fragile.
Each image, quiet yet charged, speaks to the dignity of solitude and the slow, maternal act of bringing language into being. The language feels both intimate and defiant, reminding the reader that what is unseen is not unworthy—and that in poetry, the truest power often lies in what resists being performed.
There Is Only One Sun, Let Others Catch It
By Cathy Xinman
I have never had a dream,
nor a route to follow.
I am not memorable.
Whether in kindness or in malice,
I’m used to being invisible.
Whether alone or with another,
I don’t wish to pass through the crowd.
All autumn long, I spoke only to the leaves,
sharing words in private.
When I can say no more,
I whisper to spirit instead.
Thoughts sometimes race into the universe,
yet I hesitate to open the window—
it’s in my nature
to fear the new and the alluring.
I am my own queen.
I speak only to myself,
delighting in collecting words
like children born in secret chambers—
each one unique, each a miracle.
I wish no one could see them.
They are my private bloodline,
a path only my queen may walk.
My queen even rejects the audience.
Once, someone said to me,
“You will be like Louise Glück,
receiving the greatest light.”
Ha—such a kind placebo.
I cherish that voice,
so full of goodness and belief,
and it surprises me.
For one who has never left her chamber,
the queen accepts only rare beams
that pierce the dark by accident.
If there were more light,
and if it burned a little hotter,
she would simply squint—
for there is only one sun,
let others catch it.
There is only one queen,
let others forget her.
Ha—what a truly amusing lie.
There are many great people,
remembered or forgotten,
but all I have is my queen.
We love each other
more than we love ourselves.
Cathy Xinman writes poetry in English and Chinese. Find her English-language collection, Where You Love Yourself, on Amazon. Follow Pancouver on Instagram @PancouverMedia and on Bluesky @pancouver.
